Who was I kidding---I am eating whatever I want for the most part, and I’m not even pretending to exercise! And the kicker---Thanksgiving is just around the corner---like next week! As I wallowed in my migraine induced misery, I wondered just how much I would probably gain during the upcoming holidays. When I decided to get my butt in gear in the first place I noted that I was one holiday away from 200lbs—not exactly a mile stone I want to reach.
Today- I’m still not that far off, weighing in at 183lbs. Don’t get me wrong---I’m not depressed about my weight---I happen to think I still look hot---and I am really grateful for the boobs that came along with the extra 40 lbs I am toting around. But honestly I am worried. “WORRIED”--I believe that best describes my feeling in regards to my weight. I really am worried about the associated health problems that go along with being “heavy set” (to put it mildly.)
My Grandfather has Diabetes, my grandmother died of complications due to Heart Disease, my mom has plenty of aches and pains mostly joint issues such as arthritis, and my sister is struggling with fatty liver disease and fertility issues. Not a exactly the future I want to be facing. While every condition I have just mentioned is equally serious, the only one that really shakes me is the fertility issue.
The reality of the situation is that I’m 28 years old, over weight and my biological clock is ticking! The only one that can save me is ME! I totally realize this. It’s just so frustrating, because when I get going I’m pretty darn good. I self motivate, stick to my diet, and take care of business….then something always comes up to throw me off track: LIFE. As I mentioned in my last post, nothing but good things have happened for me, but the cost is evident as I step on the scale (my arch nemesis,) and the reality of the situation becomes ubiquitous. I really need to get my butt in gear!
2 comments:
You know, accepting failure and acknowledging what’s wrong is a very good move in the right direction. 185 pounds is my goal weight for Christmas. Am I able to reach it? I hope so, if not I will set the due date further into the New Year. Congratulations on going back onto the wagon, and that’s all what counts… don’t forget that. Thanksgiving, yes in three day’s we have the “never ending food supply what will last into the weekend because of the amount we cook…
You know I liked the “boobs” too but sadly that were the first two “things” shrinking on my body. I’m pained by migraine as well, did you ever try out the wet cloth in the microwave, heating it up as hot as you can tolerate and put it in the forehead? This usually eases the pain for me. I hope you’re feeling better today.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING
7 years (nearly 8) ago when we first decided to try and have a baby, we tried with the suspision that something was wrong. It seemed that most of my adult life I've known it was going to be a battle. However, I took solace in that even if I never had children, you would. To see your blog today, scares me terribly and my heart breaks for you. I hate that you are worried about infertility as I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I pray every day that I can continue to fight against it and that you never have to. I love you, sister. My all your dreams come true.
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